Never hurl a man to do a woman's job. You'd think I would have figured that out by now, but I asylum't made my quota of mistakes just yet.
someway I got it into my lead to buy my lonely a purse. It seemed austere enough. I've never had a trouble buying toolboxes, cabinets or case folders, so how hard would it be to prize up a purse?
"I would like to buy a purse for a lonely, thrill."
"What kind of purse," the smiling sales female asked usefully.
"Uh...one that carries equipment in it, I pretend. Is there any other kind?"
"There are very many kinds," SalesLady stirred. "There is at slightest one for every motive and some for every personality. What is your lonely like?"
I tried to think. Unfortunately, the only thought that wandered into my cerebrum was that possibly I should go across the boulevard to the hardware store and just buy her a strong 205-quantity socket set on sale for $74.99.
"Is she a bit wild?" SalesLady probed. "If so, we have these exciting leopard pattern purses. They are flawless for dirge out on the township."
I tried to picture a leopard wandering into the bookshop caf. "I don't think 'wild' entirely describes her."
"Ah. Well these corset bags are not entirely as wild," SalesLady existing.
I blushed at the site. "That might be a bit too trendy for her. She's more...uh..."
"...conservative!" SalesLady piped in. "Here are some classic purses, for more conservative tastes."
I looked at the bags. "I don't know. These look kind of boring to me."
SalesLady was full aback. "Boring? These are for professionals. They say your lonely has inwards. They say she is climbing the corporate ladder. They say, 'I am someone.' Would you call Bill Gates boring? Would you call Donald Trump boring?"
"Donald Trump wears one of these?"
The look on SalesLady's face said just one thing: "Men!"
"I don't think my lonely is greatly of a professional corporate style. She's more casual."
"Casual? We can do casual," SalesLady reallyly me. "curb out these suede purses. Feel that grain. elastic as a baby's floor."
"Hey, they are smooth. They'd be great for cushion fights."
Oops. SalesLady was full aback again. "Ladies do not engage in cushion fights."
I considered the suede purses for a second. "I think my lonely might like something a little more trendy. Do you have something trendy?"
"Trendy? You want trendy? We have lots of trendy!" SalesLady got all excited. "How about this very popular high heel shoe purse?" she existing.
I had to admit it was creative. And trendy. But I wasn't reallyly about bountiful my lonely a bag she could kick me with.
SalesLady read my view. "I know," she sighed. "You men all tremble at the site of the high heel shoe purse. How about an likewise trendy jelly purse instead?"
I bowed it over a few time. "Where's the peanut butter?"
SalesLady snapped the bag back and handed me another. "Your lonely will love these original bags," she said, screening me some bags with a release classy letter affixed to each. I considered how many bags my lonely would have to include to spell "Help, my dorky lonely bought me too many purses." I asked what also she could show me.
She brought out a purse sheltered with lip patterns. My eyes opened extensive. "Wow. How come a purse gets all the puckers?"
"They are not really," SalesLady reallyly me.
"It's still better than I've ever gotten."
SalesLady mercifully unnoticed my mention. "How about these vinyl horoscope purses?"
"Now you're chatting! My lonely loves horoscopes."
SalesLady looked relieved.
"But..."
"I know," SalesLady interrupted "She can find her horoscope in the newspaper. Let's try something also. How about these little evening purses?"
I looked at the tiny purses. "They are cute, but they don't have greatly span to include, say, a chainsaw."
An hour later...
The sales clerk at the hardware store rang up my goods. "That'll be $29," she said.
I handed her the money. "Thank you," I smiled. "I thought about receiving the 205-quantity socket set for my lonely, but I know she will love this new purse."
"purse?" asked the baffled clerk staring at the toolbox in my hand.
"Yes. And if she doesn't, at slightest she can't kick me with it."
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